Teachable Moment: “Monogamy vs. Polygyny—Which One’s Actually Natural?”

By Brother Mike Allen | Digging in the Word

May 5, 2025

Let me take you behind the scenes for a second. Something went down in the comment section the other day that had me chucklin’ and shaking my head like a father watching his sons debate over who gets the front seat.

It started when a brother, @eclipsed7719·3, dropped a controversial one:

“Monogamy is unnatural.”

And sister Deborah said—“I like the simplicity of that statement.” Straight to the point, without question.

Then another brother, @Kevin-hw1fi, slid in with some fair caution:

“Not really, it's just a way of living—same with celibacy. We have to be careful with statements such as these. Makes people think that some who believe in polygyny are against monogamy when that is not the case.”

Okay. Respectfully noted. Then @eclipsed7719·3 doubled down and threw in another jab:

“The very nature of a woman is not compatible with monogamy.”

Okay, now this looks like it’s about to be on, let me go get my popcorn... but nah, for real—let’s break this scuffle up and make it a teachable moment. Alright, I see both of you are trying to uphold truth, but just from different angles. So let’s bring some clarity to this discussion.

Round 1: Which One’s More Natural?

Let’s stop looking at this through a Westernized lens and start looking at it from biology, history, and Scripture.

Polygyny wins this round.

• Biology? One man can impregnate multiple women in one sexual encounter, or say, about 5 women a day. Now what about women? Only about one deliveries per 9 months, give or take, if we’re not talking twins. That alone tells you men are designed for multi-womb reproduction. Because men, by design, are procreating machines.

• History? Ancient societies, especially Hebrew culture, practiced regulated polygyny. It wasn’t just accepted—it was common among righteous men. In fact, all societies have likely practiced polygamy throughout the ages of times, at some point. In fact, in recent times, according to the ethnographic data in the Atlas of World Cultures, 1041 out of 1231 societies were recorded as polygynous. This shows that only 1 out of 6 societies were monogamous between 1960-1980. That means, at some point in history, all societies were likely impacted by polygamy.

• Scripture? Yah never called it sin. Abraham, Jacob, Moses, David, prominent men actively practiced polygamy until their deaths. In fact, these men are noted in Hebrews 11 to be commended for their obedient faith that classifies them worthiness of the world to come. However, instead of prohibiting polygamy; Yad regulated it (Exodus 21:10, Deut. 21:15–17). That regulation proves it was normalized within covenant communities of Scripture.

  
  

So is monogamy unnatural? It’s not unnatural like drinking motor oil. But it’s not the biological or historical default either.

Round 2: Which One’s the Exception?

Monogamy is the exception. And I’m not talking about monogamy in general, I’m talking about prescriptive monogamy—as in, telling folks it’s the only righteous form of marriage. That a man can only have one woman at a time. That’s not Torah, friends. That’s Roman.

• Yah never prescribed one-man-one-woman as a command.

• He described Adam and Eve as the foundational couple through which all people descend from. Then later on, He moved on to regulate polygyny among Israel as well as, He never condemned other nations for practicing it, also.

• Celibacy and monogamy are lifestyle choices, not commandments. Just as Yah has never commanded the practice of polygamy only, He never commanded the practice monogamy only.

  
  

So when someone says “monogamy is righteous,” they’re right—but not because it’s superior. It’s just one righteous path among others. But calling it the only path? That’s where we veer off course.

Round 3: Which One Multiplies?

Let’s not play with Yah’s math. He didn’t say:

“Be fruitful and only add.”

He said:

“Be fruitful and multiply.” (Genesis 1:28)

Polygyny multiplies. Monogamy only adds.

One righteous man. Three wives. Ten kids. That’s legacy. That’s nation-building. That’s expansion. The exact reason the children of Israel were seen as a threat in Egypt in Exodus 1.

One righteous man. One wife. Two kids. Respectable. But it’s maintenance—not multiplication.

So if the goal is to fill the earth with image-bearers, covered women, and covenanted children?

Polygyny’s structure accelerates the process. It doesn’t mean monogamy is wrong—it just means it doesn’t scale the same.

Final Thoughts:

Brothers, this isn’t a cage match. Nobody’s asking you to body slam monogamy or toss celibacy out the window. But let’s stop acting like polygyny is some weird uncle at the reunion.

Polygyny is natural, historical, and biblical. Monogamy is righteous—but it’s not the original blueprint, nor the only one. Even Yah Himself decided to make His people into a great nation through the construct of polygyny before Adam and Eve were created (Genesis 33:1-7; Ruth 4:11; Ephesians 1:3-6). He also had this in mind from before the foundation of the world (Matthew 25:34 & Revelation 13:8). Why? Because only polygyny reflects Yah’s marriages He also has with the many peoples of the world (Jeremiah 3; Ezekiel 23; Matthew 25:1-13; Revelation 7:9-10). For polygyny emblematically reflects the whole of Yah’s prophetic message of redemption of the world.

And to @Kevin-hw1fi—you're absolutely right to remind folks that we don’t need to pit the two against each other. The Word makes room for both. Just don’t let culture make you uncomfortable with what Yah clearly allowed.

To @eclipsed7719·3—I see your energy, fam. Just remember: truth without fact is heat without light. We’re here to teach, not torch.

Let’s keep the convo sharp, respectful, and rooted in Scripture.

Shalom and Keep Diggin’ In The Word,

Brother Mike Allen

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To watch Sister Deborah’s video created to encourage your wives, potentials, daughters or sisters, click here: https://youtube.com/@call4wisdom?si=cVMxjPr2ksD8Y7gv